What Is Polyamory? What Does It Mean To Be Polyamorous?

  1. What Is Polyamory? What Does It Mean To Be Polyamorous
  2. What Is The Difference Between Polyamory And Polygamy?
  3. Types Of Polyamorous Relationships
  4. What Are The Challenges Of Polyamory?
  5. How Does A Polyamorous Relationship Work?
  6. How To Know It’s Right For You
  7. Establish Ground Rules And Boundaries To Consider
  8. Which Celebrities Have Been In Polyamorous Relationships?

The polyamory definition that most people are used to is rather simple: it is when a person is engaged in more than one romantic relationship or sexual relationship at a time. However, when asking, looking to discover what polyamory is, it’s important to examine all the basic principles of this concept. Being polyamorous might seem straight-forward, but it’s a topic that requires a full understanding so as not to dismiss this kind of attraction. After all, polyamorous relationships are not entirely familiar, but the people that enter them are driven by more than sexual attraction, something many people don’t care to recognize.

What Is The Difference Between Polyamory And Polygamy?

There are several notable differences between Polyamory and polygamy. Polyamory vs polygamy is one of the most significant aspects that people research when considering these relationships, so it is important to consider the gender, religion, history, region, and social integration of both relative to one another.

1 - Gender: the gender aspect of a poly relationship is probably the easiest distinction to make between the two sorts. In a polygamy situation, the relationship is almost always heterosexual, and it is usually one male and several females as wives. However, a polyamorous relationship can feature people of any gender and sexual orientation that are involved with one another in many different ways. It’s even possible for an asexual individual to be involved in a poly relationship.

2 - Religion: this is another simple distinction to make with regards to polygamy vs Polyamory. Most notably, as the relationships pertain to religion, it’s most often that someone will find a polygamy practitioner in a religion-oriented relationship instead of an open one. Poly couples that are polyamorous will not typically be involved in a religious group due to the potential for homosexual behavior and non-binary gender roles being involved, something that religions tend to disagree with.

3 - History And Region: it is hard to say when Polyamory or polygamy first started in history. However, there are some indicators of when this behavior first started to appear in written records. Some historical records date back to Mesopotamia show people were in multi-partner relationships. The same happened in Ancient Egypt, Ionia, and more. Polygamy even appeared in the Torah, the Old Testament of The Holy Bible. To say this is a common practice that is mired in historical difficulties would be an understatement. However, the major distinction that emerged over time between polygamy and Polyamory is that the latter may be practiced outside the confines of marriage, and it is more widely accepted in the present as a result.

4 - Social Integration: The social integration of Polyamory only started after it was discussed widely in the late 1990s following a tumultuous introduction in the 1960s in the western countries. Socially, polygamy is frowned upon in many western nations, but it is still practiced in them and other areas of the world. Notably, the Middle East and parts of the United States practice it. While it is illegal in the latter, there are some stats. According to research, roughly one percent of families in Utah belong to a polygamist relationship. On the other hand, the statistics on polyamorous relationships suggest that approximately four or five percent of people in the U.S. are involved in Polyamory.

Types Of Polyamorous Relationships

While most people believe that Polyamory is the entire depth of the discussion regarding these relationships, polyamorous couples come in a wide selection that we will review more thoroughly. These are the polyamorous relationship types that most people come into contact with regularly.

1 - Triad: as the name suggests, this form of poly relationship happens when three people are involved in a relationship with each other. This can form when three people take an interest in each other or when a couple goes on dating sites for Polyamory and find a partner that is right for the two of them.

2 - Quad: the quad happens when four people get involved with each other. Instead of two couples swinging for a one-time hookup, this is an ongoing poly relationship that has four people involved.

3 - Polycule: the polycule is the series of relationships in which a person finds themselves relative to a poly relationship. A person can be in one group’s triad and another group’s quad, and all those people are in that individual’s polycule.

4 - Parallel Polyamory: the concept of parallel Polyamory is related to the polycule. Similar polyamory relationships are when a person is in two relationships simultaneously, and those two relationships don’t coincide in any way.

5 - Solo Polyamory: this is a simple concept: it’s when a person goes to have a solo, open, and nonexclusive relationship with many people.

6 - Kitchen Table Polyamory: this sort of Polyamory is when you can get everyone in your polycule together at a metaphorical kitchen table for discussions, playdates, and more. You don’t have to be dating, but you should be willing to discuss your ongoing relationships.

What Are The Challenges Of Polyamory?

There are numerous challenges with Polyamory as a relationship. We’re going to answer the questions that people ask about non-monogamy most often.

Is it the same thing as cheating? No, this is not the same as cheating. This is ethical non-monogamy, which is when a person tells their partner, who agrees with them, that they’re going to be interacting with others.

How do you handle jealousy? Being jealous can be tough whether you’re married & dating or just with multiple people. Adult conversations and good boundaries help with the jealousy.

How do you bring it up to a current partner? Thinking about Polyamory is difficult in an established, monogamous relationship. You have to consider whether you want group sex or a serious relationship with other people. Bringing it up will require a careful and honest conversation, after which you can’t back out. So, make sure you’re certain about the conversation if you think the outcome could be negative.

Maintaining a Sense of Independence: The hardest part about being in a poly relationship is maintaining a sense of independence and self. Some people don’t get into a relationship with poly people in the same way that they would with others with combined housing and bank accounts, for example. The level of independence varies from person to person, though.

How Does A Polyamorous Relationship Work?

Polyamorous relationships work in a variety of different ways. While some poly people might insist that they’re never going to get married, other people are involved in a polyamorous marriage and want to meet new partners all the time. They go to polyamorous dating sites to meet interesting partners that are not their married partner. The only thing that remains the same between these different relationships is that one or more people participate in a relationship with another person. To define poly relationships in any other way is a pointless exercise because they are so different from one another.

How To Know It’s Right For You

How do you get ready for a poly relationship? How do you know that it is the right choice for you? Well, the answer to the second question can only truly be provided by you. You’re the only one that will know it’s the right thing because you will have a sense of love for more than one person, and you want to share that love with them. Yet, you have to consider the feelings of your partner. That is why the first step to setting up your relationship is sitting down to have a frank discussion with your current romantic partner. They may or may not consent to be in a relationship, or they might have certain ground rules. They might ask, what does poly mean sexually? Your married partner or long-term partner may not want to share you sexually with another individual. That could be for reasons such as fear of disease or mere jealousy. Either way, it is something that you have to discuss when you first start having these kinds of romantic interactions. Then, you have to consider what types of polyamorous relationships you want to be a part of. You might want to be in a triad, work solo, or be a part of a kitchen table polyamorous relationship. There are many specific elements to this kind of dating that you must consider when you’re getting started in this area of romance.

Establish Ground Rules And Boundaries To Consider

When considering getting started in poly relationships, you must consider the ground rules, expectations, and boundaries that you have for yourself and your partners. These are critical rules that can make or break a relationship. We’ll go over several of them that you can consider when you’re starting out in this area yourself.

For starters, you have to decide what you want to share with your partner. Is this going to be a real relationship where you live together, or is this going to be something where you have a physical and emotional relationship without romance?

Another thing that you should do is make sure that you set aside time for all of your partners. Whether you have one, two, or five different partners, it’s up to you to maintain that relationship. Otherwise, it’s just a hookup. While there’s no shame in that, you should still give them the benefit of spending quality time with you since that is mostly what they want.

One other rule to consider is that you have to set boundaries for each partner and determine whether or not they have a negative interaction with each other. Some partners don’t want to spend time with you around others, while some partners might not want a sexual relationship if you’ve been with someone else. Discover the interactions between their ground rules and determine if you can make it work. While you’re at it, determine your own ground rules and make sure that all of your partners understand that these are non-negotiable to you. You can’t be expected to compromise on some things, but you have the right to be inflexible if that is what you need to make the relationship work.

Being in a poly relationship can be hard. However, there are plenty of ways to make it a great experience if you put in the work.

Which Celebrities Have Been In Polyamorous Relationships?

There are a lot of celebrities that have delved into the world of polyamory relationships. While it’s unknown if they skulked around Polyamory dating sites or just found people by virtue of their profession, there are many famous names to consider. For example, Jake Paul and Mongeau have Polyamory married and dating relationships where they may or may not have dates with other people. It seems to be more familiar with people that still want to experience different kinds of love in their lives. Shailene Woodley is another actress who has been a part of an open relationship, though she didn’t get into any more detail than that. Former A-lister Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green had an open relationship, but the rules were complex. Brian couldn’t date anyone, but Megan was able to have a fling whenever she wanted. Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith have also come into the news recently for the latter’s affair with another man, something she called an entanglement. Lastly, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin had a poly relationship, but only he was the one that was having other relationships. It’s completely normal for people that are interested in sharing love with many people to have these sorts of relationships, and it’s even easier to do when you have the money, resources, and looks of a celebrity.

Polyamorous relationships are complex and most unique, depending on the people having them. However, with a little more information about them, most people can understand what they’re all about and see why people are so interested in having them! The vast history and present applications of this kind of romance show that love doesn’t have to have so many boundaries!

Author: Adam Williams

Adam Williams is a recognized dating and relationship expert. Working in the field of online dating and having a degree in Psychology, Adam was always interested in helping people with their relationships. He loves seeing happy couples and felling that he was the one to help them build their happiness. Adam is always happy to share his experience and running a blog on our website.